my day to be emo

woken up by the alarm clock at 9 for class
my natural instinct should be to leave it for a while, turn it off and wake up
this morning it was different
i turned it off immediately and didn't even open my eyes for one bit
that tells me
i really dun give a shit today.

and so i did that for 5 more times on a 5 minute interval...

we got a new fan yesterday night
it makes that gentle blowing noise
and it all of a sudden establishes this new atmosphere in the room
the curtains seems more relaxed
the light seems more welcoming
the music sounds fuller
it somehow also seem to make the bed more comfortable

last night was horrible
i blocked everything off wishing to just go to sleep
whilst i blocked sleeping itself off too

i kneel, i bow, i lie
i've tried everything
and neither of us are falling asleep.

now that im alone in the room
i move more freely
i breathe more eagerly
because whatever i do now
does not affect him

no school for me today.
no me for school today.

staying in on tuesdays cuz i really have no class drives me crazy most the times
i start screaming and making noises once he comes back
wasn't in human contact for too long

but staying in on a wednesday seems different
it seems like im in this wonderful music video featuring an emo girl sitting on the bed with her laptop and at the end of the mv shes still just like that, but now with a smile
i duno what im talking about. haha

goodbye :]